Early Happy St. Patricks day to ya!

http://www.figtreegallery.com/
Here is where we spent last Saturday, for their annual Medieval St Patrick’s Day celebration!
This is our third year going, and it gets better every year. Kathrynn is always interested in the fighting and music, and often is interested in the various games they have there. But with each year she has more interest, and more patience and more Presence.

This year she watched the various fighters, watched the musicians, played a couple games of chess and some other games, and participated in a Celtic dance!

Kathrynn decided that I should do the dance too, and it was particularly funny for me as i forgot my belt that day and my pants were folded over to keep them from falling off. So I was hoping that during this dance they would not slide down, although my husband was hoping they would. :X I should also mention that while i knew my husband would be watching my butt swish back and forth ( and i accentuated my movements for his benefit!) I did NOT know he was video taping the dance. So I guess its saying something (although I do not know what!) that i'm actually posting it here. :P







The first round of chess.....
The wonderful musicians!

More chess!
And some chinese checkers too.... :P
Onto some fighting.... and Wes and Kathrynn saw some archery too.....


And a still of one of the celtic dances!

A great day! :)

First warm days yeah!!!!!!

Seusspicious Behavior! We love our local library so much! They had a day of celebrating Dr Seuss' birthday. That was our first stop, where we met up w/ our friends Skye and Kt. Kathrynn had a ton of fun with all the activities, and esp. liked getting her face painted. Those face paintings remained on her cheeks for days! ;)







These are the "bears" outside our library, where the kids LOVE to play. Kathrynn was so excited in that she was able to climb up the smaller bear all by herself this year. I think i gave her a boost for the taller bear. :)

Then onward to a park, for soccer, scooting, and lots of fun. :)


The following day we went to our friends Rhonda and Virginia's house. Their sheep had just had a lamb a few days prior. Sooo cute!!!


The kids were ready for a boat ride on the lake, but the paddle boat had a ton of water in the back, so they settled for getting their suits on and hanging out in the paddle boat. :P


A couple days later was another amazing day of warmth!
We hit two parks that day- we are so grateful for the TONS of amazing parks Bloomington has to offer.

Ice cream seemed to be an appropriate way to end the day!

I'm SOOO glad our flexible lifestyle allows us to enjoy whatever Joy we choose! We spent those few warm days outside, and since then we've been back to winter temperatures.... BRRRRRRR!!!
Warm days, we'll be seeing you soon enough!!!! :)

She is my dancin' queen.....

Kathrynn has been REALLY into Mama Mia lately...... she decided to perform Mama Mia, and then La Bamba last night...... a great source of entertainment for my mother in law, who is visiting. :)

The Mama Mia segment was done a few times, so I have various segments captured on video...















Then came La Bamba, after a costume change, of course....







If only i had a video camera on the edge of my finger....... she's been doing these dances constantly over the last 48 hours- super cuteness!!!! :)

10 years of marriage

Oh, I'd love to pontificate on this..... there really is so much to say about how much growth is involved in ten years of marriage. And yet I think I'll just share some pictures of us from the last few days, and congratulate ourselves on making it to ten years...... cause yes, it really was against the odds at times. But we've made it, and we're the better for it.
Congrats to us!!!

Daily OM

I loved reading this because of how imperfect i am. lol
it reminded me that *its all good*
<3
==========================================

March 11, 2009
Set Yourself Free
Letting Go of Perfection
It is good to remember that one of our goals in life is to not be perfect. We often lose track of this aspiration. When we make mistakes, we think that we are failing or not measuring up. But if life is about experimenting, experiencing, and learning, then to be imperfect is a prerequisite. Life becomes much more interesting once we let go of our quest for perfection and aspire for imperfection instead.

This doesn’t mean that we don’t strive to be our best. We simply accept that there is no such thing as perfection—especially in life. All living things are in a ceaseless state of movement. Even as you read this, your hair is growing, your cells are dying and being reborn, and your blood is moving through your veins. Your life changes more than it stays the same. Perfection may happen in a moment, but it will not last because it is an impermanent state. Trying to hold on to perfection or forcing it to happen causes frustration and unhappiness.

In spite of this, many of us are in the habit of trying to be perfect. One way to nudge ourselves out of this tendency is to look at our lives and notice that no one is judging us to see whether or not we are perfect. Sometimes, perfectionism is a holdover from our childhood—an ideal we inherited from a demanding parent. We are adults now, and we can choose to let go of the need to perform for someone else’s approval. Similarly, we can choose to experience the universe as a loving place where we are free to be imperfect. Once we realize this, we can begin to take ourselves less seriously and have more fun. Imperfection is inherent to being human. By embracing your imperfections, you embrace yourself.

12 Exercises for Mindful Parenting by Myla and Jon Kabat-Zinn

12 Exercises for Mindful Parenting

by Myla and Jon Kabat-Zinn

With these meditative techniques, raising children can be a spiritual practice.

1. Try to imagine the world from your child's point of view, purposefully letting go of your own. Do this every day for at least a few moments to remind you of who this child is and what he or she faces in the world.
2. Imagine how you appear and sound from your child's point of view, i.e., having you as a parent today, in this moment. How might this modify how you carry yourself in your body and in space, how you speak, and what you say? How do you want to relate to your child in this moment?
3. Practice seeing your children as perfect just the way they are. See if you can stay mindful of their sovereignty from moment to moment, and work at accepting them as they are when it is hardest for you to do so.
4. Be mindful of your expectations of your children and consider whether they are truly in your child's best interest. Also, be aware of how you communicate those expectations and how they affect your children.
5. Practice altruism, putting the needs of your children above your own whenever possible. Then see if there isn't some common ground, where your true needs can also be met. You may be surprised at how much overlap is possible, especially if you are patient and strive for balance.
6. When you feel lost, or at a loss, remember to stand still and meditate on the whole by bringing your full attention to the situation, to your child, to yourself, to the family. In doing so, you may go beyond thinking, even good thinking, and perceive intuitively, with the whole of your being, what needs to be done. If that is not clear in any moment, maybe the best thing is to not do anything until it becomes clearer. Sometimes it is good to remain silent.
7. Try embodying silent presence. This will grow out of both formal and informal mindfulness practice over time if you attend to how you carry yourself and what you project in body, mind, and speech. Listen carefully.
8. Learn to live with tension without losing your own balance. In Zen and the Art of Archery, Herrigel describes how he was taught to stand at the point of highest tension effortlessly without shooting the arrow. At the right moment, the arrow mysteriously shoots itself. Practice moving into any moment, however difficult, without trying to change anything and without having to have a particular outcome occur. Simply bring your full awareness and presence to this moment. Practice seeing that whatever comes up is "workable" if you are willing to trust your intuition. Your child needs you to be a center of balance and trustworthiness, a reliable landmark by which he or she can take a bearing within his or her own landscape. Arrow and target need each other. They will find each other best through wise attention and patience.
9. Apologize to your child when you have betrayed a trust in even a little way. Apologies are healing. An apology demonstrates that you have thought about a situation and have come to see it more clearly, or perhaps more from your child's point of view. But be mindful of being "sorry" too often. It loses its meaning if you are always saying it, making regret into a habit. Then it can become a way not to take responsibility for your actions. Cooking in remorse on occasion is a good meditation. Don't shut off the stove until the meal is ready.
10. Every child is special, and every child has special needs. Each sees in an entirely unique way. Hold an image of each child in your heart. Drink in their being, wishing them well.
11. There are important times when we need to be clear and strong and unequivocal with children. Let this come as much as possible out of awareness, generosity, and discernment, rather than out of fear, self-righteousness, or the desire to control. Mindful parenting does not mean being overindulgent, neglectful, or weak; nor does it mean being rigid, domineering, and controlling.
12. The greatest gift you can give your child is your self. This means that part of your work as a parent is to keep growing in self-knowledge and awareness. This ongoing work can be furthered by making a time for quiet contemplation in whatever ways feel comfortable to us. We only have right now. Let us use it to its best advantage, for our children's sake, and for our own.

Mindfulness expert Jon Kabat-Zinn is the author of Wherever You Go, There You Are. Myla Kabat-Zinn has worked as a childbirth educator, birthing assistant, and environmental activist. Excerpted from Everyday Blessings: The Inner Work of Mindful Parenting. Copyright 1997 by Myla Kabat-Zinn and Jon Kabat-Zinn.

How to Be an Extreme Encourager by Christine Kane

How to Be an Extreme Encourager
by Christine Kane


Many years ago, when I first shared my dream of being a songwriter with one of my best friends, she knitted her brows and said, "Huh?"

I can't say I was deflated by all of the warnings that followed. After all, I had always been surrounded by this kind of "practical thinking." In fact, I probably shared my dream with her just so she'd talk me out of it.

During this fumbling stumbling time in my life, I met a man who became an unlikely best friend and mentor. He was a brilliant jazz musician, and he could do pretty much anything on the computer.

One night, after he performed at a local jazz club, we were walking towards my car. I told him my dream of being a songwriter. Without even blinking, he said, "Honey (he always called me Honey), you'd be a fabulous songwriter. That's perfect!" And he meant it.

At that moment, I felt like I was falling into a soft clean bed. I had never experienced such direct and truthful encouragement without a single "practical" warning attached to it. This friend set me free by offering one simple thing:

Encouragement.

Fast forward many years and successes and failures later. I'm surrounded by encouragers. I'm sure there are doubters around. But they don't register anymore.

Also, I have become an extreme encourager myself.

I've observed extreme encouragers. I've also recognized some traits that they all have in common. Here they are:

· An extreme encourager lives by example

The best encouragers are the ones who live it. Whether they're just getting started, or they're veteran risk-taking creativity-living wild-women - the encouragers are the ones who want a bigger life for themselves and are willing to "go there." This is why my jazz musician friend could simply offer encouragement when my other friend could not.

· An extreme encourager actively listens

Encouragers know that encouragement doesn't mean you just tell people to "buck up" or "get over it." They know how to listen. This means looking at the speaker, listening to her, setting agendas and judgments aside, and honoring the speaker as a wise soul.

· An extreme encourager avoids clichés

Avoiding clichés is actually a result of actively listening to someone. Being an extreme encourager doesn't mean that you blindly tell people "You can do it!" or "Let go of fear!" It's deeper than that. It's seeing the truth of the other person, especially when they cannot.

· An extreme encourager acknowledges the hooglie-booglies, but doesn't focus on them

We all have the hooglie-booglies. These are the voices that tell us we can't, or we shouldn't, or we'll fail, or we'll look stupid. An encourager doesn't focus on those voices because she knows they they're trying to hook her. An encourager simply acknowledges that the voices are there and that you can't make them go away by arguing with them. An encourager knows that those voices aren't the truth. They only SEEM like the truth.

· An extreme encourager remembers that no one knows what's best for anyone else

An encourager knows that we are all wise and that sometimes we make choices that might not seem so wise. An extreme encourager calls out our deepest desires and then helps us see the thoughts and fears that hold us back.

· An extreme encourager accepts miracles, grace and mystery as the deeper truth.

Extreme encouragers are often mystics of sorts. They know that the so-called "woo-woo" stuff is more real than the so-called "logical" stuff. They celebrate the divine as a simple fact of everyday existence and don't get caught up in the "prove it" mindset.

· An extreme encourager knows that you can develop the needed character traits as you go

In other words, she knows you're ready now, even if you're not perfect yet! I shudder when I read advice that discourages people from trying something because of character traits "required" in advance. "You shouldn't blog if you're not disciplined." "If you don't have focus, you can't be a writer." Most of the successful people I know developed these traits as they went. I certainly did. Encouragers understand the huge potential for growth in each human, especially when someone begins to follow her heart.

---------------

I'm grateful to the encouragers! And I'm grateful to be able to pass it on to others - either my friends, or to women in my retreats or my coaching clients!

Who has given you the encouragement you needed in your life? And do you pass it on now?



Performer, songwriter, and creativity consultant Christine Kane publishes her 'LiveCreative' weekly ezine with more than 4,000 subscribers. If you want to be the artist of your life and create authentic and lasting success, you can sign up for a FRE*E subscription to LiveCreative at www.christinekane.com.

Circus Joy becomes Play Joy!

I always find it so interesting how kids process their experiences as well as how they "take" from one activity or experience and incorporate it into their play. The next experience occurred spontaneously the night of Kathrynn attending her first circus (which she and Wes attended together):

Kathrynn called Wes and I into our living room to tell us that she had a performance for us! She came out wearing an outfit that is for her baby dolls- a size 2T dress and bottom set!!! She is a petite child, so easily stuffed herself into this outfit! I videoed the first part of the performance, and unfortunately turned it off before it got to the good part and where I finally realized what she was doing. She was imitating the performances of the clowns she’d seen that day!

She was basically doing slapstick, and it was fascinating for me to watch as I realized what was happening! The costume was picked for the absurdity value, and then the crazy dancing with her doll was to show their zany antics, and then what I didn’t’ capture on video was the funniest thing of all- she performed this slapstick routine that was very Charlie Chaplin like: she dropped her dolls hat, then went to pick it up, only to drop the doll, which led her to picking up the doll, only to dropping the hat, which led her to drop the doll…. ect! So this went on and on and it was so amazing and funny to watch her portrayal of slapstick comedy. She used great facial expressions and body language as well to express to us that she was doing this silly kind of slapstick that she had witnessed earlier that day!
This shot was the begginning of her solo act w/ Papa Baby Doll!


After her solo performance, she pulled Wes into the act, where they acted out scenes they'd seen the clowns doing earlier that day. It was SOO cute and fun to watch. :)

In this one I think they were reenacting a chicken (played by Kathrynn) chasing a clown dressed up as a chef (played by Wes). At the circus the chicken was chasing the chef around w/ a big fake knife. lol



This was another scene acted out from the circus that I didn't completely understand since I didn't go myself, but was still funny to watch. lol

After all the action was over, we went into Kathrynn's room where we played a game with the clown cards she'd collected that day. She made up a game that involved memorizing the names of the various clowns. It was a bit mentally challenging but really was fun, and great to see unfold from her first moments of creating the game until the very end when we were all playing. :)



Here is the video clip, which i unfortunately stopped before the crazy slapstick stuff started!

Connection and Laughter......

The most significant thing for a parent to contribute to anyone, is their own Connection and their own stability. An effective parent is a happy parent. An effective parent is a parent who laughs easily and often, and who doesn't take things so seriously.

Excerpted from the workshop in Albany, NY on Monday, October 1st, 2001

Our Love,
Jerry and Esther

More Star Wars Joy!

I am dumbfounded constantly by the amazing creativity that Star Wars has sparked with Kathrynn. Although she was ok playing by herself for short periods of time (SHORT) she now spends a lot of time through out the day playing out different scenes and making new scenes with her Star Wars characters.

Sometimes she creates these wonderfully creative sets that I simply LOVE! Many times the door is mostly closed, and so i am not able to get any good shots, but i'm able to listen in on the sound of her sweet voice. :)


This is one of my favorites, because she figure out how to simulate Hoth (sp?), one of the Star Wars Universe planets. She used baking soda for snow, as Hoth is covered with snow and ice. hehehe The baking soda wound up in the millennium falcon, which let to some problems, so for now Hoth is back to the world of the imagination. :)








I love these two pix also as they really show her creative sets. She set this up using a pillow against a wall to hold the flashlight in place, and then had the flashlight shine down on the scene. I don't recall the scene, but it was super neat for me to see. She often uses flashlights in play. :)



In the corner is the stadard plate of food that she nibbles from while playing. :P

Shifting from terrible to TERRIFIC!!!!

THE DAILY GROOVE ~ by Scott Noelle
www.enjoyparenting.com/dailygroove

:: Terrible Two's & Rebellious Teens... NOT! ::

(Continued from yesterday -- full text at
http://dailygroove.net/terrible-not )

Developmentally, toddlers and Teens have one thing
in common: they're on the verge of a quantum leap in
personal autonomy. They're on a mission to become
*themselves* -- to get in touch with their Inner Power
more than ever before.

Anytime they feel imposed upon or coerced, that
mission is blocked, and they instinctively protest.
In nature-based, pleasure-oriented, partnership
cultures, such protests are rarely triggered, so
terrible two's and teen rebellions rarely occur.

But in our anti-nature, control-oriented culture,
parents are expected (if not required *by law*) to
oppose or control children's natural developmental
impulses toward personal empowerment, which
guarantees the terribles!

The shift from terrible to terrific begins with your
commitment to creative partnership. Then, whenever
your child exhibits "terrible" behavior, you can
re-interpret it as evidence of his or her unfolding
autonomy, and ask yourself this:

"How can I use my creativity
to support my child's growth
in a way that works for ALL of us?"

http://dailygroove.net/terrible-not

=================================================
I especially like this "The shift from terrible to terrific begins with your
commitment to creative partnership. Then, whenever
your child exhibits "terrible" behavior, you can
re-interpret it as evidence of his or her unfolding
autonomy" as it remind me to love my child FOR WHERE SHE IS rather then where I WANT her to be.
Great stuff!

Where the Wild Things are- library :)

We went to a great library function with the theme of "Where the Wild Things Are."
It was a bit overwhelming for Kathrynn, as there were a decent number of kids, none of whom she knew. But she wound up having a GREAT time!!
IU theater students were running the program, and they really did a great job. :)
The read the book a few times, did some various dances, made masks, and acted out various parts.











They also did some really cute dances with call and respond parts that was so much fun to watch. K was excitedly awaiting her turn at the Wig-a-low dance:





I love our library!
:)

beautiful!

chain mail at its best!

======================================

*Just for this morning, I am going to step over the laundry, and pick you up and take you to the park to play.

*Just for this morning, I will leave the dishes in the sink, and let you teach me how to put that puzzle of yours together.

*Just for this afternoon, I will unplug the telephone and keep the computer off, and sit with you in the backyard and blow bubbles.

*Just for this afternoon, I will not yell once, not even a tiny grumble when you scream and whine for the ice cream truck and I will buy you one if he comes by.

*Just for this afternoon, I won't worry about what you are going to be when you grow up, or second guess every decision I have made where you are concerned.

*Just for this afternoon, I will let you help me bake cookies, and I won't stand over you trying to fix them.

*Just for this afternoon, I will take us to McDonald's and buy us both a Happy Meal so you can have both toys.

*Just for this evening, I will hold you in my arms and tell you a story about how you were born and how much I love you.

*Just for this evening, I will let you splash in the tub and not get angry.

*Just for this evening, I will let you stay up late while we sit on the porch and count all the stars.

*Just for this evening, I will snuggle beside you for hours, and miss my favorite TV shows.

*Just for this evening when I run my finger through your hair as you pray, I will simply be grateful that Source Energy has given me the greatest gift ever given.

*And when I kiss you good night I will hold you a little tighter, a little longer.. It is then, that I will thank Source Energy for you, and ask Source for nothing, except one more day.............

A portal into authenticity, integrity , and intimacy.....

From Micheal Brown's The Presence Portal.....

THE PRESENT MOMENT IS VALID - ENTERING IT CONSCIOUSLY IS A PORTAL INTO
AUTHENTICITY, INTEGRITY, AND INTIMACY.

Present moment awareness is "being fully present within each unfolding
moment just as it is - without interference - without binding it with
the resonance of fear, anger, and grief arising from our unintegrated
past". Only when we are present are we vulnerable to receiving, and
therefore able to contain, each unfolding encounter as a divinely
ordained opportunity to intimately explore the profound possibilities
of our humanity. Entering the moment fully requires a behavioral
transformation - a shift from unconscious reactivity into deliberate
responsibility. This transformation is only authentically accomplished
through integrating the underlying imprinted emotional signatures that
consistently distract us from being present.

http://www.thepresenceportal.com/index.htm
=========================
I don't have any pontificating to go with this today... I just love it.

:)

Thanks Universe! Staying connected to Source.... :)

When you can look beneath their behavior that hurt you, Lisa, and you can see the frightened child - it becomes nearly impossible to be angry and carry a grudge.
And you so can.

ILY,
The Universe


Besides, Lisa, your happiness, abundance, health, and friendships are not dependent on how others behave.


Thoughts become things... choose the good ones! ®
© www.tut.com ®
=============================

I got this today from "my notes from the universe"- I always look forward to getting this each morning. Such great stuff! :)

Today was no exception, but it really struck home for me. I do pretty well with Kathyrnn- i seem to have easy access to that unconditional love button when it comes to her.

The rest of the world is another story.

I love how this reminds me not to take other peoples' "stuff" personally. I can choose to Always be connected to my Source, my Joy, my Space, my LOVE.......
It reminds me to not be "drawn in" by the words/actions of others' business, and stay connected to *My* business- of acting and breathing and Being Love, Joy, Truth. :)
It reminds me that if I Love my Self, and stay connected to Source at all times, then I *am* also loving the world around me, and everything in it..... As we are all connected by that Source. :)

Loving that freedom.....

Hypothetically, people worry about everyone being selfishly oriented. "If everyone did exactly what they want to do, what kind of world would this be?" And we say, a really, really good one. Because if everyone did what they wanted to do, everyone would feel free. And if you feel free, you feel empowered. And every negative emotion that exists—hear this—every negative emotion that exists is because there is some sense of loss of freedom somewhere in there.

Excerpted from the workshop in Syracuse, NY on Wednesday, September 29th, 2004

Our Love,
Jerry and Esther
==================================================================

One of the things i love most about our life is the amount of freedom we feel to be Who we Are, to Love what we Love, to Do what we want to Do...... and leave behind all those "have-tos" , "shoulds" and did i say "have tos?" You other shinny people know what *exactly* what I'm talking about!!!

K and I were reading a book today, and there was so much punitive language in it..... words such as "appropriate" and "consequences" used- not in a authentic way, but as a way of control. Of course in our lives there are times when x is appropriate, and y is not. But these things are discussed and processed together, and never are they decided arbitrarily. For example, I don't decide for her that a movie or a book is "inappropriate." I do know my daughter, and I know the kind of things she likes and doesn't like. But those are *her* choices, not a judgment I am imposing on her. And consequences? We don't have artificially imposed consequences here.... And although of course there are results from actions, they are not punitive results.... they are naturally occurring results/consequences.... (like, i left the ice cream out, and its melted. whoops. :X )

As I was reading that book, i was reminded how amazingly wonderful and Blessed we are to have a life that is so Expansive and Full of Freedom, so removed from constriction and control and squashing. So Limitless, in so many ways. :)

Hmmm Joy. How i love you! :)