I was talking to Wes earlier today of loving and connecting and creating an unconditional partnership with Kathrynn, and doing so with Joy..... That for me, it is a CHOICE. I can *choose* to parent her with Joy- in each moment, unconditionally. This often means, getting up AGAIN to help her with something, or getting up AGAIN to get something for her- even when, in both situations, she *could* do xyz, or get xyz herself.
I could choose to do these things for her, and feel resentful. I could choose to do these things, and be frustrated about it. Or, I could choose to NOT do those things for her.
OR I could choose to feel Joy and connection with her when I do these things.
Sometimes I *do* get resentful. and Sometimes I *do* get frustrated. And sometimes I do ask her if she would be willing to get xyz herself because i am doing abc at that moment, or ask her if she'd be willing to wait X amount of minutes until I am done w/ my project.
My goal, however, is that when i do decide to get up, and do xyz for/with her, I have Joy in my Heart. I try to look it as another opportunity to connect with her, to meet that need in her to connect to me. I love choosing to feel Joy. :) And she appreciates that too.
After some frustrating exchanges later today, Wes reminded me of what we'd talked about earlier. He said that maybe I needed to bungee cord myself that Joy. :D
What a wonderful visual for me- and so i shall remember, during those "tough" moments, to bungee myself to Joy. Because, Joy is where i want to be. :)
I'm glad to be writing about this.... because Kathrynn just walked in to tell me that she'd knocked over a glass of apple cidar onto the rug. I looked at her, with love in my heart, and smiled, and thanked her for telling me. Then we went to clean up the juice. :) And I felt Joy in my heart, the entire time. :D
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
You are a wonderful mom; I mean it from the bottom of my heart. I'm glad you started this blog because, boy, do I need regular reminders to be patient and nice to my kids.
ReplyDeleteAww thanks Teresa! Being a mom is hard work!
ReplyDelete