I'm visiting my 94 yo grandmother this weekend. It's been a wonderful couple of days. :)
She lives in a retirement village, of sorts, and it so quiet and serene here.
I have been visiting her since Thursday evening and it has been SOOOO wonderful! The quiet, the time and space.... it is amazing and rejuvenating and very peaceful for me. It has given me some SPACE to listen to my thoughts and to enjoy Present moments with EASE. lol
As i sit here, in a little nook down the hall from her apartment, i am overhearing some kind of a rehearsal going on in the apartments , and there is an accordion playing--- such an unusual sound for me to hear and so splendid that it makes me fill with joy and wonderment.
Today at lunch there was a couple- the husband was putting all of his wife's lunch into a blender and blending it to a swallowable consistency. Mimi (my g'ma) brought it up later and explained how her husband does this every meal for her, since she had a stroke 6 years prior. Mimi sighed and said how pathetic it was, as the woman was unable to chew, talk (other then 'hi') and barely move. (the woman was in a wheel chair, and was sitting mostly upright it seemed....)
When Mimi said how pathetic she was, I told her that it was so hard to know how that woman's life was for her- that she might be in a place of beautiful peace. I explained how I try to question thoughts such as those (ie judgements) bc who knows- maybe that person is in a place closer to "god" then we can't even imagine. When I had seen the woman in the cafeteria, I had an interesting self dialogue over what that woman might possibly be experiencing.... maybe extreme joy, maybe peace, maybe anger..... who knows? What her husband was doing for her seemed beautiful. :)
After I suggested this "not knowing" to Mimi, I then empathized with Mimi about how difficult it must be to go through a stroke. I had to remind myself where *her* comments might be coming from....
We then went back to playing cards- a favorite past time of ours that has brought us such joy and connection since I was a little girl. :)
I have been walking around this place, and being with Mimi- watching and listening and just loving what is. I have been listening to my own discomfort when Mimi's 'rigidity' brushes up my own 'rigidity' and i have to laugh at myself. :)
I just love how Michael Brown (The Presence Process) breaks it down- watch as if you were watching a tv show. Pay attention to the emotional response (not to who is doing the triggering, but what the emotion that is triggered is)..... feel it.......trace it back..... where is it coming from? I love how his book has really opened up a new level of responsibility but also freedom for me..... and while i may not meditate on 'his' schedule, i do find myself doing continual breathing almost all the time now. So i am personally glad that i was fairly regimented in the beginning about doing it every morning and night bc it "trained" my body to breath with consciousness. The result has been a different level of peace and presence for me. :)
So grateful to be here..... and also grateful to hear the delicious tidbits from home. I am excited about going home and uniting with Wes and Kathrynn, and yet am just Present here and now. Loving what Is......
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Thursday, April 9, 2009
More Eckhart Tolle yumminess.....
Eckhart Tolle
Touching the Eternal
(India Retreat 2002)
And then you see how addictive thought is.
It's not easily renounced.
It comes back!
In waves, thought waves come back, and what can you do?
You watch thought waves come back...you may get drawn in, lost in thought again, until you come out, and presence is there...for a moment.
You're awake, alert, and then another thought wave comes.
And you may still be there as the witness of the thought wave, not totally taken over, in which case, it subsides quickly.
If you get totally drawn in, it may linger much longer.
Now, this isn't something that we are trying to do...it's something we are allowing to happen. If you get into the position of trying to do it, it becomes problematic again, and the 'me' comes back in.
We are not trying to become free of thought, but the state of presence is emerging already and wants to emerge.
We simply allow that to emerge...we cooperate with it.
Touching the Eternal
(India Retreat 2002)
And then you see how addictive thought is.
It's not easily renounced.
It comes back!
In waves, thought waves come back, and what can you do?
You watch thought waves come back...you may get drawn in, lost in thought again, until you come out, and presence is there...for a moment.
You're awake, alert, and then another thought wave comes.
And you may still be there as the witness of the thought wave, not totally taken over, in which case, it subsides quickly.
If you get totally drawn in, it may linger much longer.
Now, this isn't something that we are trying to do...it's something we are allowing to happen. If you get into the position of trying to do it, it becomes problematic again, and the 'me' comes back in.
We are not trying to become free of thought, but the state of presence is emerging already and wants to emerge.
We simply allow that to emerge...we cooperate with it.
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
PHEW!!! loveliness abounds....
I've said a few times that things have been kinda intense around here lately.....
Which makes you appreciate the wonderful, easy flowing days like today!!!!
K and i had a nice and easy morning, and then our friend Zoe came over, who K hadn't played with for awhile. They had such a wonderful time, and this mama was able to breath many sighs of relief!!!
I hated to bother them w/ the camera, but i did get two shots during a period of them playing dress up. :)
,
They spent the day (5 hours!!!!) doing all sorts of things.... playing various games, coloring, playing outside, playing w/ our wonderful guinea pigs, and last but not least eating yummy local organic bacon and some super yummy popcorn that i made in coconut oil. YUM!!!!
Oh, i forgot about the tickle game--- these two girls LOVE it when i play the tickle monster! They squeal with delight as i tickle them, and then figure out ways to capture me and tickle me.
What a wonderful day!!! :)
Blessed Be!
Which makes you appreciate the wonderful, easy flowing days like today!!!!
K and i had a nice and easy morning, and then our friend Zoe came over, who K hadn't played with for awhile. They had such a wonderful time, and this mama was able to breath many sighs of relief!!!
I hated to bother them w/ the camera, but i did get two shots during a period of them playing dress up. :)
,
They spent the day (5 hours!!!!) doing all sorts of things.... playing various games, coloring, playing outside, playing w/ our wonderful guinea pigs, and last but not least eating yummy local organic bacon and some super yummy popcorn that i made in coconut oil. YUM!!!!
Oh, i forgot about the tickle game--- these two girls LOVE it when i play the tickle monster! They squeal with delight as i tickle them, and then figure out ways to capture me and tickle me.
What a wonderful day!!! :)
Blessed Be!
More of our happenings :)
I love uploading our pictures and looking through to see what we've been up to over the days.....
Our days have continued to be fairly intense, but the intense moments always seem to be balanced out with moments of wonderful joy. :)
K is so excited about all that she is learning in gymnastics. she loves for me to take pictures and videos of her doing back bends and cartwheels. :)
Polka dot kid! :)
A cute baby goat was at UU one day.... kathrynn had a wonderful time cuddling with this kid. :)
We went to lake griffey a day before spring took a brief nap- so glad we were able to enjoy the warm weather. :)
K really wants to be able to go out on a kayak like her uncle john does..... one of these days!! :)
Doing some planting in the square foot gardening planter wes built. Luckily we have a nice frame that we have been able to cover up with the cold weather!
Our days have continued to be fairly intense, but the intense moments always seem to be balanced out with moments of wonderful joy. :)
K is so excited about all that she is learning in gymnastics. she loves for me to take pictures and videos of her doing back bends and cartwheels. :)
Polka dot kid! :)
A cute baby goat was at UU one day.... kathrynn had a wonderful time cuddling with this kid. :)
We went to lake griffey a day before spring took a brief nap- so glad we were able to enjoy the warm weather. :)
K really wants to be able to go out on a kayak like her uncle john does..... one of these days!! :)
Doing some planting in the square foot gardening planter wes built. Luckily we have a nice frame that we have been able to cover up with the cold weather!
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
I am a learning, growing, Becoming creature!
The following is a lovely post by Scott Noelle for his Daily Grove emails.......
I appreciate it because, being a Capricorn, I do have a tendency to be rather hard on myself and expect a tiny bit of "perfection." ;) I am reading a wonderful but also internally intensive book called The Presence Process by Michael Brown. I reminded myself last night, after reading one of his lessons for the second time, that I don't have to have the lesson mastered...... I can go on to the next lesson, and then come back and start again, as MB suggests. I don't have to be "perfect" [what i *conceive* perfect to be-- because every moment IS really perfect ;) ], right away!!! I am a learning, growing, Becoming creature, in each and every moment! That *is* perfect!
My tendency is to raise the bar for myself, to a place that i am not yet at, and not just strive to be there, but to demand of myself that i be there. Then life's little lessons reveal where i am all tangled up. Sometimes I ride the wave, and other times I slowly stray from my ideals of Presence. My tendency is then to beat myself up and at times victimize. Not where I want to be!!!!
The goal is to learn from those moments of deviation..... understand what (inside of myself) took me there. So that the next time those internal triggers occur, I can remain Present.
No regrets!!! Its all a learning process, and every moment is a turning point to new awareness, new inner beauty and discovery, and new levels of Presence. :)
========================================================
:: No Regrets ::
As you progress and become a wiser parent, you may at
times feel regret that you didn't "know better" when
your children were younger. You may even feel guilty
for "damaging" them. If so, let Mother Nature inspire
you to a more hopeful perspective.
Have you ever explored a wild forest and appreciated
the awesome way in which Life springs forth from the
chaos? Then you know Mother Nature never regrets. She
learns as she goes and always makes the best of things
as they are. She never looks back.
When a tree takes root in the shadows, Mother Nature
doesn't regret giving it a "sub-optimum" start in
life. She trusts it will bend toward the Light and
find a way to thrive. And in doing so, the tree
creates its own unique beauty.
She knows that no storm, flood, or fire can stop the
endless Flow of Life through her children.
http://dailygroove.net/no-regrets
I appreciate it because, being a Capricorn, I do have a tendency to be rather hard on myself and expect a tiny bit of "perfection." ;) I am reading a wonderful but also internally intensive book called The Presence Process by Michael Brown. I reminded myself last night, after reading one of his lessons for the second time, that I don't have to have the lesson mastered...... I can go on to the next lesson, and then come back and start again, as MB suggests. I don't have to be "perfect" [what i *conceive* perfect to be-- because every moment IS really perfect ;) ], right away!!! I am a learning, growing, Becoming creature, in each and every moment! That *is* perfect!
My tendency is to raise the bar for myself, to a place that i am not yet at, and not just strive to be there, but to demand of myself that i be there. Then life's little lessons reveal where i am all tangled up. Sometimes I ride the wave, and other times I slowly stray from my ideals of Presence. My tendency is then to beat myself up and at times victimize. Not where I want to be!!!!
The goal is to learn from those moments of deviation..... understand what (inside of myself) took me there. So that the next time those internal triggers occur, I can remain Present.
No regrets!!! Its all a learning process, and every moment is a turning point to new awareness, new inner beauty and discovery, and new levels of Presence. :)
========================================================
:: No Regrets ::
As you progress and become a wiser parent, you may at
times feel regret that you didn't "know better" when
your children were younger. You may even feel guilty
for "damaging" them. If so, let Mother Nature inspire
you to a more hopeful perspective.
Have you ever explored a wild forest and appreciated
the awesome way in which Life springs forth from the
chaos? Then you know Mother Nature never regrets. She
learns as she goes and always makes the best of things
as they are. She never looks back.
When a tree takes root in the shadows, Mother Nature
doesn't regret giving it a "sub-optimum" start in
life. She trusts it will bend toward the Light and
find a way to thrive. And in doing so, the tree
creates its own unique beauty.
She knows that no storm, flood, or fire can stop the
endless Flow of Life through her children.
http://dailygroove.net/no-regrets
Sunday, April 5, 2009
A week in review.... :)
Here are some random pix from the last week......
Preparing our square foot gardening boxes....
Flowers out front early in the morning....
Then a few hours later..... :)
Our wee grape vine surrounded by tomato plants (and a solo sugar snap pea plant)
K fell asleep in the bath tub one day this week..... On a very difficult day, might i add.
She fell asleep after coming out of a bit of a "melt down," and it provided me with 45 minutes to collect myself and giggle over the oddness of the circumstances of this afternoon nap.
When she woke up, she had one of the worst melt downs she'd had in a long time....
Which prompted me to take a long bath later that afternoon in which i hoped *i'd* fall asleep in the bath!
Kathrynn started a gymnastics class about 4 weeks ago, and LOVES it! I've been too lazy to put pictures up, so here's a sneak peak. :)
Preparing our square foot gardening boxes....
Flowers out front early in the morning....
Then a few hours later..... :)
Our wee grape vine surrounded by tomato plants (and a solo sugar snap pea plant)
K fell asleep in the bath tub one day this week..... On a very difficult day, might i add.
She fell asleep after coming out of a bit of a "melt down," and it provided me with 45 minutes to collect myself and giggle over the oddness of the circumstances of this afternoon nap.
When she woke up, she had one of the worst melt downs she'd had in a long time....
Which prompted me to take a long bath later that afternoon in which i hoped *i'd* fall asleep in the bath!
Kathrynn started a gymnastics class about 4 weeks ago, and LOVES it! I've been too lazy to put pictures up, so here's a sneak peak. :)
Saturday, April 4, 2009
More on the stories we tell ourselves......
Our thoughts can be so powerful, and can hold so much power over us.... They lead to the stories that we tell ourselves.... Stories that, if were to let go of, would lead to wonderful freedom and relief.
This quote below showed up this morning in my email, and reminded me briefly of a post i'd written a couple days ago, or was it just yesterday? :P
===============================================================
Eckhart Tolle
Touching the Eternal
(India Retreat 2002)
That of course started when they ate the fruit of the tree of knowledge of good and evil...beginning of thought.
So, the interpretation may still happen, but you don't take it that seriously anymore.
And then you realize, in any situation, the unhappiness arises out of thought...out of the story that you weave around the simplicity of this moment
This quote below showed up this morning in my email, and reminded me briefly of a post i'd written a couple days ago, or was it just yesterday? :P
===============================================================
Eckhart Tolle
Touching the Eternal
(India Retreat 2002)
That of course started when they ate the fruit of the tree of knowledge of good and evil...beginning of thought.
So, the interpretation may still happen, but you don't take it that seriously anymore.
And then you realize, in any situation, the unhappiness arises out of thought...out of the story that you weave around the simplicity of this moment
Friday, April 3, 2009
Daily OM- Deep breaths!
Deep breaths! :)
http://www.dailyom.com/
April 3, 2009
Breathing into Order
Feeling Overwhelmed
Sometimes we may feel like there is just too much we need to do. Feeling overwhelmed may make it seem like the universe is picking on us, but the opposite is true: we are only given what we can handle. Difficult situations are opportunities to be our best selves, hone our skills and rise to the occasion.
The best place to start is to take a deep breath. As you do, remind yourself that the universe works in perfect order and therefore you can get everything done that needs to get done. As you exhale, release all the details that you have no control over. The universe with it‘s infinite organizing power will orchestrate the right outcome. Anytime stress begins to creep up, remember to breathe through it with these thoughts.
Then, make a list of everything you need to do. Note what needs to be done first, and mark the things others may be able to do for you or with you. Though we often think no one else can do it correctly or well, there are times when it is worth it to exhale, let go of our control, and ask for help from professionals or friends. With the remaining things that feel you must do yourself, take another breath and determine their true importance. Sometimes they are things we’d like to do, but aren’t really necessary. After taking these quick steps, you will find you have a plan laid out, freeing you from frenzied thoughts circling in your head. With calming deep breaths, you are now free to focus more fully on our priorities. Herbal teas or flower remedies along with wise choices about caffeine and food can help keep us from becoming frantic too. But with nothing further from us than our breath, we can breathe in our best intentions and let the rest go with an exhale. Keeping ourse! lves centered and breathing into and through life’s challenges helps us learn what we are truly capable of doing, and we will find we have the ability to rise to any occasion. Remember you aren’t being picked on, and you are never alone.
http://www.dailyom.com/
April 3, 2009
Breathing into Order
Feeling Overwhelmed
Sometimes we may feel like there is just too much we need to do. Feeling overwhelmed may make it seem like the universe is picking on us, but the opposite is true: we are only given what we can handle. Difficult situations are opportunities to be our best selves, hone our skills and rise to the occasion.
The best place to start is to take a deep breath. As you do, remind yourself that the universe works in perfect order and therefore you can get everything done that needs to get done. As you exhale, release all the details that you have no control over. The universe with it‘s infinite organizing power will orchestrate the right outcome. Anytime stress begins to creep up, remember to breathe through it with these thoughts.
Then, make a list of everything you need to do. Note what needs to be done first, and mark the things others may be able to do for you or with you. Though we often think no one else can do it correctly or well, there are times when it is worth it to exhale, let go of our control, and ask for help from professionals or friends. With the remaining things that feel you must do yourself, take another breath and determine their true importance. Sometimes they are things we’d like to do, but aren’t really necessary. After taking these quick steps, you will find you have a plan laid out, freeing you from frenzied thoughts circling in your head. With calming deep breaths, you are now free to focus more fully on our priorities. Herbal teas or flower remedies along with wise choices about caffeine and food can help keep us from becoming frantic too. But with nothing further from us than our breath, we can breathe in our best intentions and let the rest go with an exhale. Keeping ourse! lves centered and breathing into and through life’s challenges helps us learn what we are truly capable of doing, and we will find we have the ability to rise to any occasion. Remember you aren’t being picked on, and you are never alone.
Trust, Presence, Listening.....
This entery was prompted by the Daily Groove I found in my email In box from Scott Noelle, which you will find at the bottom. :)
Its been an intense week for my family. Wes has his work dramas, I've been going through some rather intense internal changes and Kathrynn has been going through her own intensities. I don't know if its food allergies (i've just learned that something she's been eating daily contains a high amount of gluten- which she responds to if she gets too much off), or if its just her own internal shifts....
It all is almost TOOOOO much for me!!!!!!
Luckily i have wonderful support systems in my life- wonderful friends and some invaluable yahoo groups keep me targeted on what is important in my life and for my own growth.
There are three things that i've been really focusing on....
Trust, Presence, Listening.....
They are all interlinked and work together- ie, I have a hard time listening when i am not present. :)
Trust- I trust that it is all perfect, as it is playing out. It may not "seem" perfect, if i have my controling glasses on. But if i have my "expansive" glasses on I see that there is way more then meets the eye, and everything has its purpose. :) As Byron Katie would say, Loving what IS.
Presence- To be still enough, unconditionally watching and Being. This stillness allows me to just BE. Sometimes that means feeling love and joy, and sometimes it means feeling agitaion or frustration. But if i am present, then i can feel things things w/o reaction. I can choose not to attach a reaction to that emotion or to the "story" that I have in my mind. Being Present allows me to love and connect with K more then anything. :)
Listening- Listening to what is triggering me... to what "story" i am playing out in my mind.... and then seperating from that story. After all, it is *just* a story. Questioning those stories that lead to yuchy feelings leads me to Freedom.
Lately one of the stories that i've been questioning is that I am responsible for my families happiness and health. Another story that i'm deconstructing is that happiness and health are interdependent. I am trying to be Present enough to Listen to when these stories pop up, and then Trust enough in my process.
I love this unschooling life, as it motivates me to keep pulling at the layers and layers and layers.... Joy and Freedom are always the end result. :)
=================================================================
THE DAILY GROOVE ~ by Scott Noelle
www.enjoyparenting.com/dailygroove
:: Leading-edge Parenting Requires Faith ::
Parenting on the leading edge -- nonviolently,
unconditionally, creatively -- is an act of faith.
There's no guarantee that it will "work," and
there's no shortage of naysayers who are quick
to tell you it will NOT work.
Blind faith is believing what others tell you, but
*authentic faith* is trusting your Inner Guidance,
a.k.a. intuition, inspiration, instincts, or gut
feelings.
For this style of parenting to work, you have to
(a) stay checked in with your Guidance, (b) follow
it, and (c) accept that it takes *time* for inner
changes to be reflected in outer conditions
(including children's behavior).
Fortunately, you don't have to wait for those
outer changes. You can practice the Art of
Unconditionality and enjoy parenting now!
http://dailygroove.net/faith
Feel free to forward this message to your friends!
(Please include this paragraph and everything above.)
Copyright (c) 2009 by Scott Noelle
Its been an intense week for my family. Wes has his work dramas, I've been going through some rather intense internal changes and Kathrynn has been going through her own intensities. I don't know if its food allergies (i've just learned that something she's been eating daily contains a high amount of gluten- which she responds to if she gets too much off), or if its just her own internal shifts....
It all is almost TOOOOO much for me!!!!!!
Luckily i have wonderful support systems in my life- wonderful friends and some invaluable yahoo groups keep me targeted on what is important in my life and for my own growth.
There are three things that i've been really focusing on....
Trust, Presence, Listening.....
They are all interlinked and work together- ie, I have a hard time listening when i am not present. :)
Trust- I trust that it is all perfect, as it is playing out. It may not "seem" perfect, if i have my controling glasses on. But if i have my "expansive" glasses on I see that there is way more then meets the eye, and everything has its purpose. :) As Byron Katie would say, Loving what IS.
Presence- To be still enough, unconditionally watching and Being. This stillness allows me to just BE. Sometimes that means feeling love and joy, and sometimes it means feeling agitaion or frustration. But if i am present, then i can feel things things w/o reaction. I can choose not to attach a reaction to that emotion or to the "story" that I have in my mind. Being Present allows me to love and connect with K more then anything. :)
Listening- Listening to what is triggering me... to what "story" i am playing out in my mind.... and then seperating from that story. After all, it is *just* a story. Questioning those stories that lead to yuchy feelings leads me to Freedom.
Lately one of the stories that i've been questioning is that I am responsible for my families happiness and health. Another story that i'm deconstructing is that happiness and health are interdependent. I am trying to be Present enough to Listen to when these stories pop up, and then Trust enough in my process.
I love this unschooling life, as it motivates me to keep pulling at the layers and layers and layers.... Joy and Freedom are always the end result. :)
=================================================================
THE DAILY GROOVE ~ by Scott Noelle
www.enjoyparenting.com/dailygroove
:: Leading-edge Parenting Requires Faith ::
Parenting on the leading edge -- nonviolently,
unconditionally, creatively -- is an act of faith.
There's no guarantee that it will "work," and
there's no shortage of naysayers who are quick
to tell you it will NOT work.
Blind faith is believing what others tell you, but
*authentic faith* is trusting your Inner Guidance,
a.k.a. intuition, inspiration, instincts, or gut
feelings.
For this style of parenting to work, you have to
(a) stay checked in with your Guidance, (b) follow
it, and (c) accept that it takes *time* for inner
changes to be reflected in outer conditions
(including children's behavior).
Fortunately, you don't have to wait for those
outer changes. You can practice the Art of
Unconditionality and enjoy parenting now!
http://dailygroove.net/faith
Feel free to forward this message to your friends!
(Please include this paragraph and everything above.)
Copyright (c) 2009 by Scott Noelle
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Abraham-Hicks quote for the day :)
The more fear one has of anything, the more a vibrational match to the thing that they fear they are. Help your child discover that if she makes things that are potentially frightening a non-issue to her, then they don't bother.
Excerpted from the workshop in San Rafael, CA on Friday, March 9th, 2001
Our Love,
Jerry and Esther
Excerpted from the workshop in San Rafael, CA on Friday, March 9th, 2001
Our Love,
Jerry and Esther
Present moment loveliness <3
Eckhart Tolle
Touching the Eternal
(India Retreat 2002)
When resistance to what is doesn't arise anymore, there's no surrender anymore.
And even the present moment, which one could say is the main portal, becomes simply the state of presence...
and not so much needing to move into past and future because that movement doesn't occur anymore.
It's simply the timeless now.
Touching the Eternal
(India Retreat 2002)
When resistance to what is doesn't arise anymore, there's no surrender anymore.
And even the present moment, which one could say is the main portal, becomes simply the state of presence...
and not so much needing to move into past and future because that movement doesn't occur anymore.
It's simply the timeless now.
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Authentic Dentist Joy!
I am so grateful that authenticity is a high priority in our life! We have talked with Kathrynn about visiting the dentist many times over the years, and just when she thought she was interested in going she would change her mind. Each time this happened we respected her feelings regarding going to the dentist and postponed going. We trusted she would be ready in her own Time. And luckily, due to her genes or just plain luck, she's never had any major need of visiting a dentist before that time came.
About a month ago she decided she was ready! We set up an appointment time and she literally counted down the days! She had a GREAT visit! Her experience at the dentist was 100% positive.
I'm so glad we waited until she was ready and never pushed her to go before she was ready. :)
While at the appointment, she listened to the advice of the hygienist and dentist with interest, and once home she immediately began implementing what she'd learned!
Each morning, without me saying a thing, she has been brushing her teeth and flossing. She does the same thing each evening. After hearing war stories from other parents about "getting" their kids to brush their teeth, by force if necessary, I felt so blessed over how we have been able to avoid any power struggles and have a positive experience about her dental care.
About a month ago she decided she was ready! We set up an appointment time and she literally counted down the days! She had a GREAT visit! Her experience at the dentist was 100% positive.
I'm so glad we waited until she was ready and never pushed her to go before she was ready. :)
While at the appointment, she listened to the advice of the hygienist and dentist with interest, and once home she immediately began implementing what she'd learned!
Each morning, without me saying a thing, she has been brushing her teeth and flossing. She does the same thing each evening. After hearing war stories from other parents about "getting" their kids to brush their teeth, by force if necessary, I felt so blessed over how we have been able to avoid any power struggles and have a positive experience about her dental care.
Signs of Spring!
Cascades Park and Kite flying :)
But first! Some flowers outside our house. Kathrynn has been watching these slowly bloom, and was so excited to take some pictures. :)
Cacades Park with our friends.
I love this picture! As I took this picture Kathrynn was saying how happy she was to be wading through the creek. It made me fill with joy as I watched her in her joy. :)
At our friend Dani's house- our first kite flying of the season!
Our friend Skye flying the kite!
K was so excited to get that kite up in the air!
It was a bit difficult for her to figure out how to run, then stop and let the line out.... maybe next time we'll figure out how to coordinate that. No matter, it was all PERFECT!!!!!!
But first! Some flowers outside our house. Kathrynn has been watching these slowly bloom, and was so excited to take some pictures. :)Cacades Park with our friends.
I love this picture! As I took this picture Kathrynn was saying how happy she was to be wading through the creek. It made me fill with joy as I watched her in her joy. :)
At our friend Dani's house- our first kite flying of the season!
Our friend Skye flying the kite!
K was so excited to get that kite up in the air!It was a bit difficult for her to figure out how to run, then stop and let the line out.... maybe next time we'll figure out how to coordinate that. No matter, it was all PERFECT!!!!!!
Thursday, March 26, 2009
A lovely Eckhart Tolle quote :)
Eckhart Tolle
Touching the Eternal
(India Retreat 2002)
So to be with a human...just allow them to be.
And when you speak, during those periods during which we speak...be in the state
of alert attention which is the state of listening totally.
To giving total attention as you listen to the words...complete attention.
Not preparing the next statement, or interpreting what the other person is
saying.
Just give complete attention.
Maybe you won't say anything...maybe some words will come...who knows.
That is bringing the unconditioned consciousness into human interactions.
Touching the Eternal
(India Retreat 2002)
So to be with a human...just allow them to be.
And when you speak, during those periods during which we speak...be in the state
of alert attention which is the state of listening totally.
To giving total attention as you listen to the words...complete attention.
Not preparing the next statement, or interpreting what the other person is
saying.
Just give complete attention.
Maybe you won't say anything...maybe some words will come...who knows.
That is bringing the unconditioned consciousness into human interactions.
am i strong enough??
I recently wrote a piece for an ezine about Kathrynn's birth. It focused on the idea of whether I was strong enough to go through the birthing process....... or more so, the concept that women go through this period of self doubt during childbirth....
Its an interesting process.... childbirth. but the concept-- am i strong enough-- does not end at childbirth...
in fact, it seems to linger..... throughout this WONDERFUL adventure called life. :)
I had a pretty intense day on monday, and that concept popped back into my head, rather strongly...... Am i strong enough to be the mother i want to be, the mother my child needs me to be, the mother my child deserves to have.....
Am i strong enough to be.... ME??!?!?
In short, YES!!!!!
I AM strong enough. Breathing continual breaths, staying in each moment, opening my eyes to Joy, being Present..... All these things allow me to be strong enough.
It is all good. It is all amazing. The good is the bad is the bad is the good. Its all of those things and none of those things. Its all good. Its all amazing.
and, I *am* strong enough.
Its an interesting process.... childbirth. but the concept-- am i strong enough-- does not end at childbirth...
in fact, it seems to linger..... throughout this WONDERFUL adventure called life. :)
I had a pretty intense day on monday, and that concept popped back into my head, rather strongly...... Am i strong enough to be the mother i want to be, the mother my child needs me to be, the mother my child deserves to have.....
Am i strong enough to be.... ME??!?!?
In short, YES!!!!!
I AM strong enough. Breathing continual breaths, staying in each moment, opening my eyes to Joy, being Present..... All these things allow me to be strong enough.
It is all good. It is all amazing. The good is the bad is the bad is the good. Its all of those things and none of those things. Its all good. Its all amazing.
and, I *am* strong enough.
Your joy is your way to joy.....
Our life HAS been joyful this week!!!! We've been spending lots of time outside, taking advantage of the warm sun shinning brightly!!! Pictures forthcoming, but wanted to share this interesting quote for now.....
Have a joyful day!!!
:)
lisa
=================================================================
Life is supposed to be fun. You said, "I'll go forth and choose. I'll look at the data, and I'll say, yes to this, and yes to this, and yes to this, and I'll paint a picture of the things that I want, and I'll vibrate about them, because that's what I'm giving my attention to. And the Universe will respond to my vibration. And then I'll stand in a new place where a whole new batch of yeses are available, and I'll say yes to this, and yes to this, and yes to this." You did not say, "I'll go forth and struggle into joy", because from your Nonphysical Perspective you know it is vibrationally not possible. You cannot struggle to joy. Struggle and joy are not on the same channel. You joy your way to joy. You laugh your way to success. It is through your joy that good things come.
Excerpted from the workshop in Los Angeles, CA on Sunday, August 2nd, 1998
Our Love,
Jerry and Esther
Have a joyful day!!!
:)
lisa
=================================================================
Life is supposed to be fun. You said, "I'll go forth and choose. I'll look at the data, and I'll say, yes to this, and yes to this, and yes to this, and I'll paint a picture of the things that I want, and I'll vibrate about them, because that's what I'm giving my attention to. And the Universe will respond to my vibration. And then I'll stand in a new place where a whole new batch of yeses are available, and I'll say yes to this, and yes to this, and yes to this." You did not say, "I'll go forth and struggle into joy", because from your Nonphysical Perspective you know it is vibrationally not possible. You cannot struggle to joy. Struggle and joy are not on the same channel. You joy your way to joy. You laugh your way to success. It is through your joy that good things come.
Excerpted from the workshop in Los Angeles, CA on Sunday, August 2nd, 1998
Our Love,
Jerry and Esther
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Ostara Joy!
Kathrynn LOVES ritual!
She's been celebrating Spring Equinox since she as long as she can remember, and often talks about her egg hunt when she was 2 (she's watched the video of that about a GAJILLION times ;) )
We usually take a leisurely two days for our seasonal holidays. On Ostara day we had a lovely dinner out at one of our favorite restaurants, http://www.farm-bloomington.com/farminfo.html, and then Kathrynn went to the UU for a wonderfully intimate Ostara ritual. Kathrynn banished fear of pain, and welcomed good health.... and we planted flower seeds into our wishes for the year. It was a wonderful ceremony. :)
Kathrynn continues to love Star Wars, and has been asking for a Jar Jar Binks and an Naboo fighter plane, so this was her Ostara present. Boy was she excited!!!!!!!!
The next day was a day filled with beautiful Sun, planting activities, and lots of Eggs!
She and wes were busy most of the morning putting together our square foot gardening boxes (http://www.squarefootgardening.com/). She was very proud and excited over their accomplishments. :)
I joined into help and then got busy planting some more seeds. :)
Later in the afternoon I hid the plastic eggs that I had filled with yummy snacks, as is our tradition every year. :) I LOVE this part of Ostara, because it fills kathrynn with such innocent Joy. It was super cute watching her find the various eggs hidden around our yard. I took a video of her looking for the last egg, which eluded her for quite some time. ;)
Then i couldn't resist taking some video of her opening the eggs for their hidden treasures. :)
After that we moved onto dying eggs and decorating them. Unfortunately by this point I had realized that something was horribly amiss with my back, and i was experiencing a lovely pinching sensation in my lower back. But I did get a few good pictures before I retired to the bed. :)
I'm so grateful for Spring finally getting here, and it was a wonderful celebration to welcome her in!
She's been celebrating Spring Equinox since she as long as she can remember, and often talks about her egg hunt when she was 2 (she's watched the video of that about a GAJILLION times ;) )
We usually take a leisurely two days for our seasonal holidays. On Ostara day we had a lovely dinner out at one of our favorite restaurants, http://www.farm-bloomington.com/farminfo.html, and then Kathrynn went to the UU for a wonderfully intimate Ostara ritual. Kathrynn banished fear of pain, and welcomed good health.... and we planted flower seeds into our wishes for the year. It was a wonderful ceremony. :)
Kathrynn continues to love Star Wars, and has been asking for a Jar Jar Binks and an Naboo fighter plane, so this was her Ostara present. Boy was she excited!!!!!!!!
The next day was a day filled with beautiful Sun, planting activities, and lots of Eggs!
She and wes were busy most of the morning putting together our square foot gardening boxes (http://www.squarefootgardening.com/). She was very proud and excited over their accomplishments. :)
I joined into help and then got busy planting some more seeds. :)
Later in the afternoon I hid the plastic eggs that I had filled with yummy snacks, as is our tradition every year. :) I LOVE this part of Ostara, because it fills kathrynn with such innocent Joy. It was super cute watching her find the various eggs hidden around our yard. I took a video of her looking for the last egg, which eluded her for quite some time. ;)
Then i couldn't resist taking some video of her opening the eggs for their hidden treasures. :)
After that we moved onto dying eggs and decorating them. Unfortunately by this point I had realized that something was horribly amiss with my back, and i was experiencing a lovely pinching sensation in my lower back. But I did get a few good pictures before I retired to the bed. :)
I'm so grateful for Spring finally getting here, and it was a wonderful celebration to welcome her in!
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Not in a rush in our own mind.....
My friend text'd me to tell me about this great quote she found while reading a magazine...
"If we are not in a rush with our own mind, we have the patience to let things unfold...."
I wish I could give credit to whomever authored this sentence, but it so captures my life sometimes.....
Mothering a child who feels BIG.... being a woman who is highly sensitive her self, and tends to feel "bigness" as well..... it is important for me to be able to be Still in times of "duress."
My mother in law left monday after being here for a week. Kathrynn always has a hard time transitioning after visits (or sometimes during visits) to places or when people visit here...... When her known energetic environment shifts, as occurs when we visit family or they visit us, she has to transition back to homeostasis once the visitors are gone (or sometimes even while we are still w/ family if the visit is long enough). This process is all unspoken, and so even more difficult to understand.
When I follow the road map of her behaviors, I am able to see the chaos and the "out of sorts" feelings she is experiencing. During these times she has "melt downs" and her ability to be flexible to the ebbs and flows of life diminsh greatly. It is them my job to "not rush in my own mind", but instead to be Centered and Still and Present for her.... to allow her to fully process whatever she is experiencing, and be there for her when she comes out on the other side. When i try to resist this process, it goes horribly.... Both of us wind up in tears. When i wait it out, things unfold almost Magically..... The end of the world can seem be near, but then with the next breath she is somewhere else energetically and has moved to a new place of Being.
This has been our last couple days. The world crashing down on us, Connecting, Listening, Loving, Waiting......transitioning into being secure in the world and ready to leap tall buildings with a single bound.... Rinse. Repeat. Breath. Reminding myself that All *is* Well.
Each time the world seems to be crumbling down around us- each time those emotions are *so* BIG!!!- I still often feel a twinge of "Oh No!" Then i breath, and remember the process. That it *will* be ok. That is is ok *now*. That with patience, things will unfold. Keeping my mind from feeling the anxiety and worry and desperation that my daughter is feeling is crucial. Those are not *my* feelings.... those are HERS. And I can not help her by mimicing them in myself.
Keeping my mind Still, not in a rush to find solutions or to make the world "perfect" for her, allows that unfolding to occur in a peaceful and magical way. Even if i have a hard time feeling the peace and magic while it is happening, I always look back on it and See it clearly, when I have Choosen to be Patient. What is more exciting for me is that now, after all these years, even while its happening , i think i *finally* can get a glimpse of that peace and magic *while* the chaos still ensues. I have started to Believe in the beauty of Presence and Patience.
With each episode I am left both exhausted and exhilerated..... That Bigness is a lot for me to process. But coming out on the other side is AMAZING. This parenting stuff..... its amazing. :)
"If we are not in a rush with our own mind, we have the patience to let things unfold...."
I wish I could give credit to whomever authored this sentence, but it so captures my life sometimes.....
Mothering a child who feels BIG.... being a woman who is highly sensitive her self, and tends to feel "bigness" as well..... it is important for me to be able to be Still in times of "duress."
My mother in law left monday after being here for a week. Kathrynn always has a hard time transitioning after visits (or sometimes during visits) to places or when people visit here...... When her known energetic environment shifts, as occurs when we visit family or they visit us, she has to transition back to homeostasis once the visitors are gone (or sometimes even while we are still w/ family if the visit is long enough). This process is all unspoken, and so even more difficult to understand.
When I follow the road map of her behaviors, I am able to see the chaos and the "out of sorts" feelings she is experiencing. During these times she has "melt downs" and her ability to be flexible to the ebbs and flows of life diminsh greatly. It is them my job to "not rush in my own mind", but instead to be Centered and Still and Present for her.... to allow her to fully process whatever she is experiencing, and be there for her when she comes out on the other side. When i try to resist this process, it goes horribly.... Both of us wind up in tears. When i wait it out, things unfold almost Magically..... The end of the world can seem be near, but then with the next breath she is somewhere else energetically and has moved to a new place of Being.
This has been our last couple days. The world crashing down on us, Connecting, Listening, Loving, Waiting......transitioning into being secure in the world and ready to leap tall buildings with a single bound.... Rinse. Repeat. Breath. Reminding myself that All *is* Well.
Each time the world seems to be crumbling down around us- each time those emotions are *so* BIG!!!- I still often feel a twinge of "Oh No!" Then i breath, and remember the process. That it *will* be ok. That is is ok *now*. That with patience, things will unfold. Keeping my mind from feeling the anxiety and worry and desperation that my daughter is feeling is crucial. Those are not *my* feelings.... those are HERS. And I can not help her by mimicing them in myself.
Keeping my mind Still, not in a rush to find solutions or to make the world "perfect" for her, allows that unfolding to occur in a peaceful and magical way. Even if i have a hard time feeling the peace and magic while it is happening, I always look back on it and See it clearly, when I have Choosen to be Patient. What is more exciting for me is that now, after all these years, even while its happening , i think i *finally* can get a glimpse of that peace and magic *while* the chaos still ensues. I have started to Believe in the beauty of Presence and Patience.
With each episode I am left both exhausted and exhilerated..... That Bigness is a lot for me to process. But coming out on the other side is AMAZING. This parenting stuff..... its amazing. :)
Beautiful! 4 day clothes and all ;)
I had the following conversation with Kathrynn the other morning:
me: here's some clothes to change into. [I put some clothes down next to where she is and then leave the room]
[I return a few minutes later to see the clothes untouched and that she is also not interested in them]
me: we have to go soon (Spanish class, which she loves!), lets get your clothes changed (offering to help her)
k: why do i have to change my clothes?
me: well, you've been wearing them since sat. That's 4 days. Don't you think that's long enough?
K: well, not exactly.
me: ok then!
She played for a few more minutes and then we were out the door!
================================================================
I love this conversation for a few reasons.....
I love the authenticity of our exchange and the honesty of our words. You may note the baggage and presumption that I still have, that after 4 days, clothes should be changed! I tried very hard to speak them with out judgment or shame, and more out of genuine inquiry. I *think* I succeeded. :) I love that after hearing my words, she was able to honestly reply that she did not agree with my assessment..... AND I love how I listened to her short response, and respected it.
(After re-reading the exchange, I am reminded how hurried we were that morning, and how normally I would have asked her if she was interested changing her clothes, and if she'd like to pick something out or if she'd like me to.... And I also am made aware of my secret agenda for her to change her clothes, by skipping asking her, and just going straight to picking out clothes for her...... I love how it is all so revealing and allows me to See.)
Sometimes its hard for me to see Kathrynn wearing clothes that are mismatched, disheveled, stained, maybe even a bit too big or small in sizing. This also transfers over to her hair-- she doesn't like it brushed or combed when it is dry, so this only occurs after we've showered or bathed. Which means that about 2 day a week, or maybe 1 day a week, her hair is shinny and brushed and "pretty." The other days its a bit tangled and stuck together. lol I'm taken back to when I was a girl, and my mom didn't allow me to have long hair because my hair was "stringy" and it didn't look as nice (to *her*) long as it did short. I understand the "idea" of this discomfort, but then........
I look at my Beautiful and Shinning child, and realize that she is who she IS- tangled hair and disheveled clothes included. And that THAT is also Beautiful and Shinning. In fact, it is ESPECIALLY Beautiful and Shinning!
The judgments I place on things such as clothes and the hair of my child limits my ability to just Be with her. It can get in the way of my ability to love All of her, and love her for who she Is.
I'm not interested in things that get in my way of Being with her. :)
I was at a library program long ago and they were getting some video footage for their public television channel, and I remember telling one of the librarians that people who saw the video might think my child lived inside of a car- her clothes had spots on them and her hair had not been brushed in days. The librarian looked at me and told me how beautiful my child was. And I looked at Kathrynn, and saw her Joy, and I smiled because YES! my child was beautiful! Kathrynn *is* beautiful- All the time, in each Moment.
She is beautiful when she is smiling or frowning or laughing or crying. She is beautiful when she puts on her favorite dress and when her hair is freshly combed. And she is beautiful when she is wearing clothes for the 4th day in a row, and her hair hasn't seem a comb in two or so days. It's All beautiful. :)
I know each kid is different and that it is not necessarily indicative of anything specific. But sometimes I can't help but get Joy out of how unaware Kathrynn is somewhat oblivious about how she looks and how others might judge her for how she looks. I secretely love that Kathrynn doesn't care what she's wearing, or if it is like the "other girls" or if it looks "cool" or if she looks "pretty." She knows, because I've told her, that she is Pretty in each Moment. All the time.
I love that she loves Being. Raw and unencombered by the "rules" of society. Free to be who she is. Without the baggage of "looks."
Hrm.... makes me realize how much baggage I have regarding all this for myself. Once again, Kathrynn, my Guru, tearing down my illusions. I am grateful for it. :)
Life is Beautiful. :)
me: here's some clothes to change into. [I put some clothes down next to where she is and then leave the room]
[I return a few minutes later to see the clothes untouched and that she is also not interested in them]
me: we have to go soon (Spanish class, which she loves!), lets get your clothes changed (offering to help her)
k: why do i have to change my clothes?
me: well, you've been wearing them since sat. That's 4 days. Don't you think that's long enough?
K: well, not exactly.
me: ok then!
She played for a few more minutes and then we were out the door!
================================================================
I love this conversation for a few reasons.....
I love the authenticity of our exchange and the honesty of our words. You may note the baggage and presumption that I still have, that after 4 days, clothes should be changed! I tried very hard to speak them with out judgment or shame, and more out of genuine inquiry. I *think* I succeeded. :) I love that after hearing my words, she was able to honestly reply that she did not agree with my assessment..... AND I love how I listened to her short response, and respected it.
(After re-reading the exchange, I am reminded how hurried we were that morning, and how normally I would have asked her if she was interested changing her clothes, and if she'd like to pick something out or if she'd like me to.... And I also am made aware of my secret agenda for her to change her clothes, by skipping asking her, and just going straight to picking out clothes for her...... I love how it is all so revealing and allows me to See.)
Sometimes its hard for me to see Kathrynn wearing clothes that are mismatched, disheveled, stained, maybe even a bit too big or small in sizing. This also transfers over to her hair-- she doesn't like it brushed or combed when it is dry, so this only occurs after we've showered or bathed. Which means that about 2 day a week, or maybe 1 day a week, her hair is shinny and brushed and "pretty." The other days its a bit tangled and stuck together. lol I'm taken back to when I was a girl, and my mom didn't allow me to have long hair because my hair was "stringy" and it didn't look as nice (to *her*) long as it did short. I understand the "idea" of this discomfort, but then........
I look at my Beautiful and Shinning child, and realize that she is who she IS- tangled hair and disheveled clothes included. And that THAT is also Beautiful and Shinning. In fact, it is ESPECIALLY Beautiful and Shinning!
The judgments I place on things such as clothes and the hair of my child limits my ability to just Be with her. It can get in the way of my ability to love All of her, and love her for who she Is.
I'm not interested in things that get in my way of Being with her. :)
I was at a library program long ago and they were getting some video footage for their public television channel, and I remember telling one of the librarians that people who saw the video might think my child lived inside of a car- her clothes had spots on them and her hair had not been brushed in days. The librarian looked at me and told me how beautiful my child was. And I looked at Kathrynn, and saw her Joy, and I smiled because YES! my child was beautiful! Kathrynn *is* beautiful- All the time, in each Moment.
She is beautiful when she is smiling or frowning or laughing or crying. She is beautiful when she puts on her favorite dress and when her hair is freshly combed. And she is beautiful when she is wearing clothes for the 4th day in a row, and her hair hasn't seem a comb in two or so days. It's All beautiful. :)
I know each kid is different and that it is not necessarily indicative of anything specific. But sometimes I can't help but get Joy out of how unaware Kathrynn is somewhat oblivious about how she looks and how others might judge her for how she looks. I secretely love that Kathrynn doesn't care what she's wearing, or if it is like the "other girls" or if it looks "cool" or if she looks "pretty." She knows, because I've told her, that she is Pretty in each Moment. All the time.
I love that she loves Being. Raw and unencombered by the "rules" of society. Free to be who she is. Without the baggage of "looks."
Hrm.... makes me realize how much baggage I have regarding all this for myself. Once again, Kathrynn, my Guru, tearing down my illusions. I am grateful for it. :)
Life is Beautiful. :)
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